Beyond being quick to claim credit, we can also get good at shifting the blame to others. Perhaps you’ve seen someone who’s adept at this. Nothing is ever their fault, and they get defensive easily. And anything that doesn’t go right is the result of someone else. And although it’s easy to see when other people do this, sometimes we can do the same thing internally, always blaming something or someone for anything that goes wrong.
When it comes to shifting the blame, perhaps it’s because focusing on where we fall short can be very uncomfortable. It’s much easier to look at everyone else, and point out where they failed. Maybe we feel that admitting mistakes will lessen other’s opinion of us, or may tarnish the self-image we try hard to protect. Perhaps there’s a sense that if we shift the spotlight off of us and onto the failures of others, it will make us look better in comparison.
But the flip side is this: When we take responsibility for our own failures, not only do we demonstrate our maturity, but we also show that we’re seeing clearly. We recognize what we could have done differently, and how we can improve. Because whether we admit it or not, others will know our weaknesses, even if we constantly blame them on someone else.
And ironically enough, admitting an error and taking responsibility for our own shortcomings typically garners much more respect that constantly saying it was someone else’s fault.